Please, No More of the Virtue Signaling Wars

Enough is enough.

When I was a kid and was driving my dad crazy, he would say to me, “Amy, you are driving me to the hilt of Gannilt.” It was his way of saying that I’d pushed him to the limits of his sanity. Lol.

And now, I say it to my children.

Well, the virtue-signaling in the US has driven me to the hilt of Gannilt.

Every bloody day, I settle in and watch the virtue wars unfold. No topic is off-limits.

“Well, I looooove to wear my mask. I’m saving lives. I’m so pro-life. Anyone who doesn’t squeal with joy at wearing a mask is NOT PRO-LIFE and wants EVERYONE TO DIE!!!!!!”

“Well, I will NEVER wear a mask because I’m not a brainwashed, unpatritoic idiot! GIVE ME FREEDOM!”

“Vaccines are going to save us all! Everyone should love vaccines! I inject my kids because I love them more than you love yours.”

“Vaccines are the debil! Everyone should hate vaccines! I don’t inject my kids because I love them more than you love yours.”

“I’m a better Catholic because I would rather miss Communion than receive Christ in my hand.”

“I’m a better Catholic because I’d rather die of COVID than not go.”

I simply can’t take it anymore. The virtue-signaling wars have left me utterly exhausted and irritated. I feel like I’m dragging myself across the floor, uttering, “Please, no more.”

Social media has allowed this virtue-signaling beast to rise up in all of us–yes, even me. I’m guilty of it, too. We sit behind our screens and judge everyone under the sun based on memes or a 280-word comment. In an effort to make ourselves feel superior, we compare our thoughts and beliefs against every single thing written on social media.

Here’s the thing, if you have to announce your virtue with a sarcastic remark or an insult, well, whatever virtue you had just went out the door. For any virtue–prudence, temperance, fortitude, piety, courage–to really be a virtue, it must be coupled with love and humility. We simply aren’t humble and loving people when we have to showcase our virtue or throw it up in people’s faces.

If we think any of this pleases Christ, we’d be wrong. People are complex creatures and we all have different backgrounds and experiences. We all have unique thoughts about things–some are grounded in truth, others aren’t, but it’s still important to realize that someone’s past has shaped their thinking today. To add to that, we all have different circumstances going on in our lives at the present moment.

I get why some people want to wear a mask and some don’t. I get it. There are valid reasons for both.

I get why some people are down with getting vaccines and I get why some people want to steer clear. There are valid reasons for both.

I get why people shudder at receiving Communion in the hand, but some of us, myself included, can feel the lack of the Eucharist in our lives when we don’t receive it for weeks on end. The Church allows for in-the-hand Communion. While on the tongue is best, it’s important not to tell people they are sinning when the Church allows for reception in the hand. I’d much rather receive on the tongue, but I’m simply not strong enough to go months and months without Christ. Spiritual Communion is nice, but my soul gets desperate.

This race to virtue-signal at every possible instance is not actually making us more virtuous people. Sure, we put up the lawn signs declaring our stance on this or that and we can put up social media banners that let the world know how virtuous we are, but all this does is feed our egos.

I’m not saying it’s wrong to let people know how you feel about an issue or situation going on in our country. I think, though, it’s important to check our motives. Are we doing it so that we feel like we are social justice warriors and we want people to be impressed with us? Are we doing it as a warning to those that oppose us that we will not tolerate any kind of disagreement on the subject? Are we doing it to follow the crowd so we can avoid attack and ridicule?

When the George Floyd incident went down, my daughter had an acquaintance ask her through a private message on Instagram why she hadn’t posted anything showing her solidarity with BLM. My daughter uses her social media for enjoyment and connection and never posts anything remotely controversial. She doesn’t want to use it for that. Yet, here she was being pressured to post something so that people would know that she was being virtuous according to their standards. For the girl questioning my daughter, all that mattered was that she hadn’t seen my daughter’s virtue signal. It made her uncomfortable and so she felt she had the right to inquire about my daughter’s supposed lack of concern.

The truth is, my daughter doesn’t have to announce her non-racist beliefs by posting a meme or a profile picture banner. The way she conducts herself and lives her life is enough. She has been raised to treat people of all races with dignity and respect and she does. That is what matters.

Our virtues should be lived and not promoted. Sadly, because of our human weaknesses, we are inclined to promote our virtues in order to get pats on the back and props from others. However, it is good to remember that the ability to live out a virtue well comes from God. The graces He bestows on us help us to be virtuous people. Any virtue we possess should give witness to Christ and encourage others, by our actions, to strive for that virtue, as well. If we gloat about any supposed virtue we have; if we use it to smack another person down; if we advertise it so as to look better than others, well, it is doubtful we truly possess that virtue in the first place.

This kind of behavior doesn’t become us as Christians and I challenge us all, myself included, to strive to be better.

Until next time, live the faith virtuously and boldly, Catholic Pilgrims.