Let’s Just Hate All The Good Things, Shall We?

When my Facebook page blew up a few weeks ago with all the “child-free” advocates of the world, I was bombarded with some of the most heinous comments imaginable. I read them, not because I enjoyed it, but because I’m prone to studying people and they laid in my lap a morbid, yet fascinating case study. I deleted most of the comments because I didn’t want my followers’ eyes to bleed, but I noted the themes of what they were spewing and I tucked them away for blog fodder.

Over and over again in the comments, I noticed that people were talking about how horrible human beings are. Here are a few of the less vile examples:

“Human beings are nothing but a scourge on the planet. It’d be better if we were gone and the planet and animals were left alone to carry on without us.”

“I’m nothing but a burden to the planet. I’ve felt like a burden my whole life. Human beings need to just get out of the way.”

“We don’t need any more human beings. All we do is suck up resources, pollute, and wreck the planet. It’d be wrong to add more human beings by having kids.”

I think you get the point. All this hate for humankind really made me pause. Where the heck is this coming from? You’ll notice that each one is very similar to the other comments, almost like out of a playbook. As I was musing over all this, I began to realize that there are a lot of things–good things–that have become objects of hate.

There’s hate towards men. There are those that suggest men should just hate themselves already because nothing they do is worth a darn.

There’s hate for children. Trust me, when people are calling them “vagina vermin, bloodsuckers, and crotch goblins” there’s not a lot of love there. I can’t tell you how many times I read that children are “annoying, disgusting, filthy, and not worth it.”

There’s hate towards religion.

There’s even a growing trend of Americans who hate America. It’s what the cool kids do these days.

But, where did all this start? I thought long and hard about this. When did people really start hating things that are good? These are just my thoughts and mostly I’m just typing out loud. I know that people have been hating things since the beginning but I’m looking at the here and now and trying to understand where this trend is coming from, especially within my own country.

My thoughts took me back to when women really started rejecting staying at home and having kids. There was this whisper in the ear that expressed the idea that staying at home was actually lower than “man’s work.” It said, “It’s unworthy, meaningless, and undesirable.” I’m all for women working outside the home if that’s what their family needs and if they are called to it. I have worked outside the home during my marriage. It’s not wrong and I’m not advocating that all women give up their jobs and stay at home, so before you write me, hear me out.

As a woman, I know the argument. The argument was pounded into my head in college and it tore me up inside the first years of my marriage. I didn’t know if I could amount to anything if I desired to stay home with my babies. In college, all typical “women’s work” (read housework) was looked down upon. Staying at home to raise children was about the worst thing you could do. You were letting all women down if you stayed home. You’d never make a difference, you’d be dependent on your spouse, and you’d waste away into nothingness never having done a thing with your life.

There are women who enjoy working while being mothers and wives. I’m not speaking of those women. There is nothing wrong with being a working mom–nothing in the world. My mom was a working mom and she handled it all like a champ. I worked for a time. However, there is a growing number of women that hate anything that is deemed “womanly.” Interestingly enough, at the same time, these are the same women who consistently rant and rave about men and how horrible they are. It’s almost a jealous hate. The thought goes something like this: “Womanly” things are bad and so we must strive to be more like men. Yet, men are horrible and they should just realize it already. It’s a bizarre illogical thought process.

So, we have women who hate anything that is seen as traditionally female. This has lead to a rejection of the beauty of motherhood. If you think I’m joking, please feel free to peruse the child-free Facebook pages. It’s not that these people just don’t feel like they are cut out for motherhood; it’s that they hate it: Hate babies. Hate children. Hate the thought of motherhood. It’s all awful beyond words to them.

But, the hate hasn’t stopped there. Once you unleash hate, it only seeks to hate more in order to be fed.

What has happened over time is that people have started looking at anything from the past and scanning it over with a laser beam. If these people find one thing–ONE THING–wrong from the past, it needs to be hated and discarded. Historical context means nothing. The complexity of human beings and their nature is ignored. There is zero mercy to be found with these people. If you messed up in the past, you should be hated. Consequently, men, white men specifically, are to be loathed because some were slave owners in the past. America is worthy of hate because, as a country, we have mess-ups, failures, and even outright horrible practices as part of our history. Religion, Christianity specifically, is worthy of hate because it’s a patriarchal, antiquated, brainwashing bunch of nonsense that has to go, don’t you see?

Now, sadly, the hatred has moved on to human beings. We, as humans, are hating ourselves. Why? Because we screw things up, we do evil things, we are causing the world to “literally burn!” The planet would be better off without us! We suck. End of story.

As I was reading the haters’ comments, three words came to my mind: Bleak, hopeless, and joyless. I felt like Garth from “Wayne’s World” with the Suckcut on his head. “It’s sucking my will to live, man!” Their thoughts made me feel horrible and I can’t imagine going around with their life views. I can see that if you had all these hate-filled beliefs swirling in your head how you would just try to maximize your pleasure here on Earth until your flame runs out and they bury you in the ground. I mean, what’s to live for? I guess, just you if even that.

In reading those comments, I was so grateful for my Christian Faith. We are taught that, yes, we are sinners and, yes, we do things wrong but we can turn it around. With God’s grace, we can become better. We can forgive and be forgiven. We can seek mercy and be merciful ourselves. We can choose love.

To be born a woman is a wonderful thing. We know that not all women will be exactly alike and that’s okay, but there is no reason to sneer at “traditional” female things. Work is good for all of us whether inside or outside the home. It ALL has purpose and meaning. And if you are a working mom, we should give you a high five because it isn’t easy and there’s always some guilt. And if you are a stay-at-home mom, we should give you a high five because it isn’t easy and there’s always some guilt.

To be born a man is a good thing, too. Men and women are created in the image and likeness of God. Have some men done bad things? Yes. Have some women? You better believe it. But, there are also a lot of men who are trying their hardest to be good husbands, fathers, brothers, sons, countrymen, and workers. It’s one’s character that needs to be judged, not gender.

America has her scars and ugly marks. It’s okay to acknowledge that. She also has her bright moments, too. If you are looking for a perfect country, you will never find it. It’s okay to love your country and be proud of her even if not everything has been done perfectly within her borders. If that was the case, then nobody could have a love of country.

What about us as humans? We are the source of so much suffering on this Earth. Yet, we are also the source of so much good. When we strive to live for others and reach out to our fellow man, that is when we are at our best. As long as we are still breathing, there is the hope of turning it around. Each day that we wake up, we are afforded the opportunity to become better and help make things better. Will all of us do this? No. So, does this mean we toss up our hands and give over to despair? Never. The best thing to do is to look at ourselves and ask how we can become a better human being. All of us have that ability and capacity, yet without hope it will be very difficult to attain.

Without God it is very hard to have hope, Catholic Pilgrims. Life seems very bleak when you go around hating every good thing. So, strive to be living examples of hope, joy, and goodness and never forget that you are loved by an infinite God.