Do you like my Wayne’s World reference in the title? I’m one of those people that takes any opportunity to quote movies and I do not apologize for it.
What comes to mind when you hear the word “contempt?” Do you picture a seething, hateful person? Maybe you picture someone who sneers the smile of one who is devoid of happiness?
Do you ever picture a joyful person? No, of course not. That’s kind of a stupid question, isn’t it?
I’m willing to bet that most people would say that they hold no hatred in their hearts towards anyone. When I lived in Vegas, I only gambled one time, but right now I’d lay down money that people would say they have never had contempt for anyone or anything. Contempt is a
Even though most people would say that they hold no contempt for anyone, we are surrounded in our country with lots of contemptuous tension. I feel it and I know I can’t be the only one. It’s sort of a standing joke nowadays to advise people not to read the comments section of anything online. Why? Well, all the contempt, of course! Reading the comments section drags you down into a pit of despair and makes you wonder how we continue to survive as humans.
What exactly does contempt mean? It means to regard someone or something as worthless and vile. It means to have an attitude of complete disdain. So, before I wrote this blog, I had to ask myself, “Have I ever had contempt for anyone or anything?” But, before we get to my answer, I need to clarify something.
It is okay to have contempt for dangerous ideas, toxic belief systems, or outright evil practices. Abortion is an evil practice and we should have contempt for it because it is the killing of innocent life. There is no worth or value to the practice of abortion. We should have contempt for moral relativism because it is a toxic belief system. We can’t just believe whatever we want about morals and deny
But, contempt for other people? Well, that’s where the line is drawn. As Christians, we can’t have contempt for any human being. Why? Because all humans, whether acting badly or not, have worth. We may struggle to see it, but God doesn’t. He loves even the worst of us. It’s difficult to understand that, but God willed that soul into being, therefore, that person has dignity, purpose, and worth. We don’t get to decide who has worth, only God does and He says we all do.
Here’s the trouble, though. As our society has moved further and further away from God, more contempt has crept in. Following Christ reminds us that He died for all of us and that means He loves all of us. When we are in touch with the Creator, we remember that all have worth in His eyes. However, as we’ve abandoned God to follow our own wills, we’ve stopped seeing the worth in others. We’ve taken the contempt we have for certain ideas and extrapolated our hate onto the people who believe in those ideas. Before we know, we stop having contempt for the idea and, instead, simply hate the person or group associated with it. Don’t believe me? Ever heard these comments?
I hate liberals.
I hate conservatives.
I hate Christians.
I hate atheists.
I hate drug-users.
I hate my ex.
So, have I ever had contempt for someone? Yes, I have. My two past abusive boyfriends were held in great contempt by me. It’s understandable, but, in truth, it turned me into a bitter, angry person. I, also, had contempt for the Catholic Church and Catholics back in the day. There was no real basis for this contempt because I had never studied Catholicism or tried to truly understand it. I simply took what other Protestants said about Catholics and Catholicism and adopted their beliefs as my own.
What’s so odd is that my best friend growing up was Catholic. Obviously, I didn’t hate her. My husband is a cradle Catholic and when we met, it didn’t cause me to hate him. I somehow compartmentalized their religious beliefs from who they were otherwise. I did pick a lot of fights with my husband early on in our marriage about Catholicism. Over time, my husband got me to actually listen to him and when I did, I started to see how wrong I was about Catholics and Catholicism. Now, here I am, a Catholic blogger. God’s ways are not our ways and He finds incredible ways to humble us.
The point is, when I held certain people in contempt, I was not a happy person. That contempt started to seep into every area of my life. When I look back on when I was filled with contempt, I cringe. I was not a joyful person to be around. You simply cannot be a joyful person and hold contempt for people. It’s impossible. There are a lot of people out there who seem deserving of contempt. There are some very evil people out there who have done some pretty heinous things. I’m not saying that we must ignore or gloss over what they’ve done. It is okay to hold their actions in contempt, but we can’t hate the person. I hate abortion, but the contempt I have for it has never sucked
The post All This Contempt Is Sucking My Will To Live appeared first on .
]]>Do you like my Wayne’s World reference in the title? I’m one of those people that takes any opportunity to quote movies and I do not apologize for it.
What comes to mind when you hear the word “contempt?” Do you picture a seething, hateful person? Maybe you picture someone who sneers the smile of one who is devoid of happiness?
Do you ever picture a joyful person? No, of course not. That’s kind of a stupid question, isn’t it?
I’m willing to bet that most people would say that they hold no hatred in their hearts towards anyone. When I lived in Vegas, I only gambled one time, but right now I’d lay down money that people would say they have never had contempt for anyone or anything. Contempt is a
Even though most people would say that they hold no contempt for anyone, we are surrounded in our country with lots of contemptuous tension. I feel it and I know I can’t be the only one. It’s sort of a standing joke nowadays to advise people not to read the comments section of anything online. Why? Well, all the contempt, of course! Reading the comments section drags you down into a pit of despair and makes you wonder how we continue to survive as humans.
What exactly does contempt mean? It means to regard someone or something as worthless and vile. It means to have an attitude of complete disdain. So, before I wrote this blog, I had to ask myself, “Have I ever had contempt for anyone or anything?” But, before we get to my answer, I need to clarify something.
It is okay to have contempt for dangerous ideas, toxic belief systems, or outright evil practices. Abortion is an evil practice and we should have contempt for it because it is the killing of innocent life. There is no worth or value to the practice of abortion. We should have contempt for moral relativism because it is a toxic belief system. We can’t just believe whatever we want about morals and deny
But, contempt for other people? Well, that’s where the line is drawn. As Christians, we can’t have contempt for any human being. Why? Because all humans, whether acting badly or not, have worth. We may struggle to see it, but God doesn’t. He loves even the worst of us. It’s difficult to understand that, but God willed that soul into being, therefore, that person has dignity, purpose, and worth. We don’t get to decide who has worth, only God does and He says we all do.
Here’s the trouble, though. As our society has moved further and further away from God, more contempt has crept in. Following Christ reminds us that He died for all of us and that means He loves all of us. When we are in touch with the Creator, we remember that all have worth in His eyes. However, as we’ve abandoned God to follow our own wills, we’ve stopped seeing the worth in others. We’ve taken the contempt we have for certain ideas and extrapolated our hate onto the people who believe in those ideas. Before we know, we stop having contempt for the idea and, instead, simply hate the person or group associated with it. Don’t believe me? Ever heard these comments?
I hate liberals.
I hate conservatives.
I hate Christians.
I hate atheists.
I hate drug-users.
I hate my ex.
So, have I ever had contempt for someone? Yes, I have. My two past abusive boyfriends were held in great contempt by me. It’s understandable, but, in truth, it turned me into a bitter, angry person. I, also, had contempt for the Catholic Church and Catholics back in the day. There was no real basis for this contempt because I had never studied Catholicism or tried to truly understand it. I simply took what other Protestants said about Catholics and Catholicism and adopted their beliefs as my own.
What’s so odd is that my best friend growing up was Catholic. Obviously, I didn’t hate her. My husband is a cradle Catholic and when we met, it didn’t cause me to hate him. I somehow compartmentalized their religious beliefs from who they were otherwise. I did pick a lot of fights with my husband early on in our marriage about Catholicism. Over time, my husband got me to actually listen to him and when I did, I started to see how wrong I was about Catholics and Catholicism. Now, here I am, a Catholic blogger. God’s ways are not our ways and He finds incredible ways to humble us.
The point is, when I held certain people in contempt, I was not a happy person. That contempt started to seep into every area of my life. When I look back on when I was filled with contempt, I cringe. I was not a joyful person to be around. You simply cannot be a joyful person and hold contempt for people. It’s impossible. There are a lot of people out there who seem deserving of contempt. There are some very evil people out there who have done some pretty heinous things. I’m not saying that we must ignore or gloss over what they’ve done. It is okay to hold their actions in contempt, but we can’t hate the person. I hate abortion, but the contempt I have for it has never sucked
The post All This Contempt Is Sucking My Will To Live appeared first on .
]]>
Sometimes I get so riled up about an issue that it’s a good thing I have three kids to keep me occupied, otherwise I’d be prone to blasting off angry blogs. Yesterday was one of those days where the good Lord had to pull back on the reins because I was ready to bust out the gate with an uncharitable blog. Today, I’m more serene….like a sun-basking lioness.
I was perusing my friend’s Facebook page when I saw that she had posted something about Pope Francis’ response to the Church’s sex abuse scandals. The pope’s response is an issue for another day. What got steam blowing out of my ears was a comment underneath the article. The commenter stated, “I mean no disrespect but the problem lies in not letting them marry.” What this woman is suggesting is that celibacy is the cause of sexual abuse. She is stating that priests molest because they don’t have a wife to have sex with and if they just had a wife to have sex with then nearly all sexual abuse situations would be cleared up. Closely attached to this thought is that priests are lonely for a family. But, it doesn’t follow that because someone is lonely for a family they start molesting post-pubescent boys. This myth has been promulgating around the internet and, today I am here to tackle this myth because it’s very dangerous. Allow me to explain….
This issue is very near and dear to my heart because my bachelor’s and master’s degrees are in criminology and I specialized in dealing sexual crimes. I have worked with offenders, victims, and all the institutions that deal with sexual abuse, such as the courts, police stations, and hospitals. It bothers me greatly when people spread myths (unknowingly sometimes) about this crime because it leaves people very vulnerable. It also sends us on a wild goose chase after a perceived cause when we should be looking elsewhere. I realize that most people aren’t informed on this topic because who really wants to spend their days reading about sex crimes? Not too many people are interested in it and I get it. I have to remember to be patient with people, which is why I feel very compelled to make sure we are getting the truth out there so that people can be safe and we can work to correct the problem effectively.
So, does living a celibate life cause priests to commit sexual abuse?
No. There is no link. Many people think that if the offending priests had just been allowed to marry all problems would be solved. As Trent Horn, a Catholic apologist, states, “It’s important to remember that marriage is not a guarantee of sexual purity.” If that were true, we would find no issues of adultery, pornography addiction, marital rape (yes, it does happen), or any other sexual deviancy within marriage. But, we do. In fact, nearly every single case I have ever dealt with involved men who were married or had access to sexual relationships. So, clearly, marriage is not a safeguard.
It is extremely dangerous to think that if a man is married he would never commit this kind of crime. It leaves your kids exposed. If you think married men are safe because marriage keeps men from molesting and raping, you will be blind to potential predators. I’m not suggesting that all married men are potential threats. The truth of the matter is that potential threats can come from all walks of life and believing that one particular group is safe is dangerous.
What is the problem?
The problem is people leading unchaste lives no matter their place in life. If you are married, you are called to live chastely. If you are single, you are called to live chastely. If you have taken vows of celibacy, you are called to live chastely. Giving into sexual temptations, no matter who you are, leads to sexual sins. The point is, if celibacy were the cause of this, we would find only celibate men and women committing these acts and that’s just not the case.
Now, there is the tendency of those outside the Catholic Church to feel very prideful when it comes to this issue. “This is a problem within the Catholic Church,” they say. You can almost sense that people think they are safe because they aren’t around “those dirty celibate priests.” (Actual words I have seen.) Two points on this:
- This is a crime where we should be rallying to support and help those that are struggling with this issue, not sneer down at them just because you disagree with their belief system. Pride should be checked at the door. I’ve seen plenty of gleeful comments almost relishing in the fact that the Catholic Church is having to deal with this problem.
- If you think that because your kids don’t go to a Catholic Church they are safe, you are sorely mistaken and you run the risk of putting your kids in danger by thinking that this is a “Catholic Church problem.” I have dealt with offenders of every background you can imagine. Every background. To add to that, I have dealt with cover-ups in all institutions: Police departments, schools, the federal government, and families. It happens in Protestant churches, LDS churches, Jewish communities, and every other place you can imagine. Rich people and poor people are affected. Sexual sins know no bounds. I hate that it touches so many people, but the only way we fix this is by not thinking that this is someone else’s problem. “That would never happen in our community,” is a dangerous thing to think. This is a human problem. We all can be hurt by it and it’s not localized to one certain grouping of people that we can just steer clear of.
It’s important to understand why priests practice celibacy. It’s not some arbitrary rule the Catholic Church imposes on priests. It’s not a dogma …
The post Celibacy Does Not Lead Catholic Priests to Commit Sexual Crimes appeared first on .
]]>Sometimes I get so riled up about an issue that it’s a good thing I have three kids to keep me occupied, otherwise I’d be prone to blasting off angry blogs. Yesterday was one of those days where the good Lord had to pull back on the reins because I was ready to bust out the gate with an uncharitable blog. Today, I’m more serene….like a sun-basking lioness.
I was perusing my friend’s Facebook page when I saw that she had posted something about Pope Francis’ response to the Church’s sex abuse scandals. The pope’s response is an issue for another day. What got steam blowing out of my ears was a comment underneath the article. The commenter stated, “I mean no disrespect but the problem lies in not letting them marry.” What this woman is suggesting is that celibacy is the cause of sexual abuse. She is stating that priests molest because they don’t have a wife to have sex with and if they just had a wife to have sex with then nearly all sexual abuse situations would be cleared up. Closely attached to this thought is that priests are lonely for a family. But, it doesn’t follow that because someone is lonely for a family they start molesting post-pubescent boys. This myth has been promulgating around the internet and, today I am here to tackle this myth because it’s very dangerous. Allow me to explain….
This issue is very near and dear to my heart because my bachelor’s and master’s degrees are in criminology and I specialized in dealing sexual crimes. I have worked with offenders, victims, and all the institutions that deal with sexual abuse, such as the courts, police stations, and hospitals. It bothers me greatly when people spread myths (unknowingly sometimes) about this crime because it leaves people very vulnerable. It also sends us on a wild goose chase after a perceived cause when we should be looking elsewhere. I realize that most people aren’t informed on this topic because who really wants to spend their days reading about sex crimes? Not too many people are interested in it and I get it. I have to remember to be patient with people, which is why I feel very compelled to make sure we are getting the truth out there so that people can be safe and we can work to correct the problem effectively.
So, does living a celibate life cause priests to commit sexual abuse?
No. There is no link. Many people think that if the offending priests had just been allowed to marry all problems would be solved. As Trent Horn, a Catholic apologist, states, “It’s important to remember that marriage is not a guarantee of sexual purity.” If that were true, we would find no issues of adultery, pornography addiction, marital rape (yes, it does happen), or any other sexual deviancy within marriage. But, we do. In fact, nearly every single case I have ever dealt with involved men who were married or had access to sexual relationships. So, clearly, marriage is not a safeguard.
It is extremely dangerous to think that if a man is married he would never commit this kind of crime. It leaves your kids exposed. If you think married men are safe because marriage keeps men from molesting and raping, you will be blind to potential predators. I’m not suggesting that all married men are potential threats. The truth of the matter is that potential threats can come from all walks of life and believing that one particular group is safe is dangerous.
What is the problem?
The problem is people leading unchaste lives no matter their place in life. If you are married, you are called to live chastely. If you are single, you are called to live chastely. If you have taken vows of celibacy, you are called to live chastely. Giving into sexual temptations, no matter who you are, leads to sexual sins. The point is, if celibacy were the cause of this, we would find only celibate men and women committing these acts and that’s just not the case.
Now, there is the tendency of those outside the Catholic Church to feel very prideful when it comes to this issue. “This is a problem within the Catholic Church,” they say. You can almost sense that people think they are safe because they aren’t around “those dirty celibate priests.” (Actual words I have seen.) Two points on this:
- This is a crime where we should be rallying to support and help those that are struggling with this issue, not sneer down at them just because you disagree with their belief system. Pride should be checked at the door. I’ve seen plenty of gleeful comments almost relishing in the fact that the Catholic Church is having to deal with this problem.
- If you think that because your kids don’t go to a Catholic Church they are safe, you are sorely mistaken and you run the risk of putting your kids in danger by thinking that this is a “Catholic Church problem.” I have dealt with offenders of every background you can imagine. Every background. To add to that, I have dealt with cover-ups in all institutions: Police departments, schools, the federal government, and families. It happens in Protestant churches, LDS churches, Jewish communities, and every other place you can imagine. Rich people and poor people are affected. Sexual sins know no bounds. I hate that it touches so many people, but the only way we fix this is by not thinking that this is someone else’s problem. “That would never happen in our community,” is a dangerous thing to think. This is a human problem. We all can be hurt by it and it’s not localized to one certain grouping of people that we can just steer clear of.
It’s important to understand why priests practice celibacy. It’s not some arbitrary rule the Catholic Church imposes on priests. It’s not a dogma …
The post Celibacy Does Not Lead Catholic Priests to Commit Sexual Crimes appeared first on .
]]>
(Update: Michelle passed away on July 10th, 2018. If you are reading this, please offer up a prayer for her and her family.)
I’m so happy to bring you April’s featured woman, Michelle, of Give Him 5 Ministry. Michelle was prompted to start her ministry to encourage people to give Christ at least five minutes each day. As I was prepping Michelle’s blog, I came across a recent video of her where she discloses that she has terminal cancer. As I watched the video, my eyes filled with tears–not of pity, but of awe in this woman who still has a smile on her face and joy in her heart. In the video, Michelle genuinely smiles and talks about how she wants to use this cross she is bearing to draw people closer to Christ. She also said that cancer is not going to steal her joy. I was infinitely impressed. Michelle has such a great ministry and I ask that you all pray for her. Pray for her strength, for courage, for healing, and for others to be encouraged and comforted by her words. You can connect with Michelle at her website and on Facebook. She is an amazing woman and I pray that this blog blesses you in some way.
1. Are you a cradle Catholic or a convert? If a convert, where did you convert from?
Both! Alright, I know that isn’t a valid answer, but it makes sense to me. I grew up Catholic. My family went to Mass most weekends. It was my wonderful mother who “made” the family go, but as a child I didn’t get anything out of it and Mass meant nothing to me. I had no idea what was going on and I was not well catechized. My parents divorced when I was
young and my mom tried her best to keep us going to Church. In my mind, I was always thinking, “I can’t wait until I’m old enough to make my own decisions and not have to do this anymore.” When I was in my twenties I felt the Lord drawing me back. It was then that I finally learned about the treasure that is found in the Catholic Church. I am still unpacking its beauty. It was also at that time that I fell in love with Jesus Christ and finally felt worthy of His love. That’s a story for another time.
2. Who is one of your favorite saints and why?
That’s a difficult question. I love so many of the saints. They are a great inspiration to me and I know
their intercession is powerful. Saint John Paul II has always been very special to me. He died on my birthday and I love his deep devotion to Mary and Divine Mercy. St. Peregrine has now become my “go to” guy.
3. Besides the Eucharist, what is your favorite part of the Mass?
That’s not really a fair question, but I will answer. Everything! I feel so much joy just walking into the church and looking up at the Crucifix and greeting my King. I feel as if I have come home every time. I love the readings and the music and preparing ourselves to receive His most Precious Body. The prayers of the consecration would be my favorite part as we wait for the moment when everything changes and Our Lord is fully present before us. Wow!
4. Where is the best Catholic place you’ve visited?
We had the opportunity to visit Rome for our 25-year wedding anniversary and it would be impossible to narrow it down to one place. The churches were beyond my imagination in their beauty. I also loved visiting the home of St. Catherine of Siena.
5. What’s a myth or misconception you hear about the Catholic faith?
The myth that grieves my heart the most is when I hear people refer to Catholics as not being Christians. I have been hearing this more and more lately. The idea really hit home this past summer when I was with some friends at a non-Catholic church event. I was introduced to someone as being Catholic. The person then added, “Oh, but she really loves Jesus”. The way she said it implied that I was an exception because I was Catholic AND had a great love for Jesus. I think that is a very popular mis-conception among other faiths that we don’t worship Jesus Christ.
6. Why do you love being Catholic?
As a Catholic, I have the ability to receive Jesus fully present in the Eucharist. That is why I love being Catholic! It has
been such a profound and intimate experience in my life that God placed a song on my heart called Like The First Time. If you would like to hear it and see the video, you can watch it here.
I also love the unity we have with the universal Catholic Church. Each day, across the globe, we are all worshiping with the same scripture readings that unite us as a community. We are the hands and feet of Jesus. I have experienced this recently in my own local church community. I have been a member of my parish for 26 years and upon receiving a recent diagnosis of terminal cancer I have been showered with an abundance of love, prayers and support from this beautiful community. It is because of my Catholic faith and my love for Jesus Christ that I have hope in the plans God has for me. After my diagnosis, I created a video to encourage people. You can see it here.…
The post Why I Love Being Catholic: Michelle of the Give Him 5 Ministry appeared first on .
]]>
(Update: Michelle passed away on July 10th, 2018. If you are reading this, please offer up a prayer for her and her family.)
I’m so happy to bring you April’s featured woman, Michelle, of Give Him 5 Ministry. Michelle was prompted to start her ministry to encourage people to give Christ at least five minutes each day. As I was prepping Michelle’s blog, I came across a recent video of her where she discloses that she has terminal cancer. As I watched the video, my eyes filled with tears–not of pity, but of awe in this woman who still has a smile on her face and joy in her heart. In the video, Michelle genuinely smiles and talks about how she wants to use this cross she is bearing to draw people closer to Christ. She also said that cancer is not going to steal her joy. I was infinitely impressed. Michelle has such a great ministry and I ask that you all pray for her. Pray for her strength, for courage, for healing, and for others to be encouraged and comforted by her words. You can connect with Michelle at her website and on Facebook. She is an amazing woman and I pray that this blog blesses you in some way.
1. Are you a cradle Catholic or a convert? If a convert, where did you convert from?
Both! Alright, I know that isn’t a valid answer, but it makes sense to me. I grew up Catholic. My family went to Mass most weekends. It was my wonderful mother who “made” the family go, but as a child I didn’t get anything out of it and Mass meant nothing to me. I had no idea what was going on and I was not well catechized. My parents divorced when I was
young and my mom tried her best to keep us going to Church. In my mind, I was always thinking, “I can’t wait until I’m old enough to make my own decisions and not have to do this anymore.” When I was in my twenties I felt the Lord drawing me back. It was then that I finally learned about the treasure that is found in the Catholic Church. I am still unpacking its beauty. It was also at that time that I fell in love with Jesus Christ and finally felt worthy of His love. That’s a story for another time.
2. Who is one of your favorite saints and why?
That’s a difficult question. I love so many of the saints. They are a great inspiration to me and I know
their intercession is powerful. Saint John Paul II has always been very special to me. He died on my birthday and I love his deep devotion to Mary and Divine Mercy. St. Peregrine has now become my “go to” guy.
3. Besides the Eucharist, what is your favorite part of the Mass?
That’s not really a fair question, but I will answer. Everything! I feel so much joy just walking into the church and looking up at the Crucifix and greeting my King. I feel as if I have come home every time. I love the readings and the music and preparing ourselves to receive His most Precious Body. The prayers of the consecration would be my favorite part as we wait for the moment when everything changes and Our Lord is fully present before us. Wow!
4. Where is the best Catholic place you’ve visited?
We had the opportunity to visit Rome for our 25-year wedding anniversary and it would be impossible to narrow it down to one place. The churches were beyond my imagination in their beauty. I also loved visiting the home of St. Catherine of Siena.
5. What’s a myth or misconception you hear about the Catholic faith?
The myth that grieves my heart the most is when I hear people refer to Catholics as not being Christians. I have been hearing this more and more lately. The idea really hit home this past summer when I was with some friends at a non-Catholic church event. I was introduced to someone as being Catholic. The person then added, “Oh, but she really loves Jesus”. The way she said it implied that I was an exception because I was Catholic AND had a great love for Jesus. I think that is a very popular mis-conception among other faiths that we don’t worship Jesus Christ.
6. Why do you love being Catholic?
As a Catholic, I have the ability to receive Jesus fully present in the Eucharist. That is why I love being Catholic! It has
been such a profound and intimate experience in my life that God placed a song on my heart called Like The First Time. If you would like to hear it and see the video, you can watch it here.
I also love the unity we have with the universal Catholic Church. Each day, across the globe, we are all worshiping with the same scripture readings that unite us as a community. We are the hands and feet of Jesus. I have experienced this recently in my own local church community. I have been a member of my parish for 26 years and upon receiving a recent diagnosis of terminal cancer I have been showered with an abundance of love, prayers and support from this beautiful community. It is because of my Catholic faith and my love for Jesus Christ that I have hope in the plans God has for me. After my diagnosis, I created a video to encourage people. You can see it here.…
The post Why I Love Being Catholic: Michelle of the Give Him 5 Ministry appeared first on .
]]>
After my middle child “retired” from gymnastics, she wanted to try out different sports. She chose volleyball first and after learning the game, she was invited onto the traveling team. She was pretty excited, as was I, seeing as I played volleyball growing up. The coach set up an orientation meeting with the new parents to go over the handbook and policies. At the start of the meeting, one of the first things the coach said was, “We are thinking about doing practice on Sundays, is everyone okay with that?”
I looked around the room and every single parent nodded their head in agreement. I raised my hand and politely said, “No, I wouldn’t be okay with that.” The collective sigh from all in the room was very audible. I knew what they were thinking: “Here is one of those religious nuts.”
There was a time in my life when I would have nodded my head, too. On my drive home that day, I thought a lot about how our devotion to the Lord’s Day has been overshadowed by nearly everything else in our lives. It’s an afterthought, an “if we get around to it” kind of event, or, even worse, not even a thought at all.
Sitting in the car, I thought back over my faith journey, my pilgrimage, if you will. I remembered how when I was a teen, my mom never let me slack off in my attendance at church on Sundays. Some Sundays I went and didn’t mind, but there were several Sundays where I was loath to get out of bed and go.
In college, I think I maybe went to church eight times; two times a year for the four years I was in college. Those times would have been Easter and Christmas. I don’t even recall thinking that it might be a good idea to go to church at all during my college years. I was content to smugly tell myself that I was a believer and I was a “good” person. I thought that was sufficient.
Going to church was hit or miss for Dustin and me during our early years of marriage. Most Sundays we were happy to just sleep in. I was always arguing anyway with him about where to go to church since he was Catholic and I was Protestant. For awhile, our impasse impeded our presence in the pews.
I look back now and I realize that I had all the excuses:
“God knows I believe in Him, so that’s good enough.”
“I can worship God anywhere. I don’t need church.”
“People at church are annoying and hypocritical.”
“I can’t stand the music.”
“It’s so hard with a baby.”
“I need to sleep in. God understands.”
I could go on and on with the mountainous multitude of excuses I heaped up. Once I became Catholic, though, my understanding of church and its importance started to become clear. Mass is the source and summit of our lives and, if that is true, it means everything to be present in church on Sundays.
I’m a football fan. I love my Kansas State Wildcats. When I was in college, I was lucky enough to attend every single home game as a member of the marching band or just as a regular student. I love the atmosphere. The smells of BBQ and popcorn. The roar of the crowd that is so loud that it makes your eyes swim. In the summer, you sweat it out and wait for the sun to slip behind the press box. In the winter, you adorn yourself with layers and huddle close with your neighbor. There’s the anticipation, the excitement, the letdown, the heartache, the joy, and even the frustration that a fan goes through that makes the experience real, full, and worth the effort to go.
I live far away from my beloved Cats now and can’t go to home games like I desire. Some games, my husband and I have to listen to the game on the radio, old school like. Some Saturdays, we get to watch the Cats on TV, but it’s not the same. There are the distractions of home and kids. You don’t get to experience all the sensory sensations and it just doesn’t compare to being present in the stadium. What I miss the most, though, is being there with my Wildcat family. I miss the community. I miss hugging a complete stranger when we win a big game. I miss high-fiving my fellow Cat fans when there is a first down or an interception. I miss that closeness and that bond we share as fans of our university. It’s a bonding experience and it connects us in ways that watching on TV can’t replicate.
As I began to understand why God wants us to join on Sundays to worship Him, my whole outlook on it changed. Now, I desire now more than anything to be at Mass on Sundays. I wish I could go to daily Mass. I see the importance of gathering together with my fellow Catholics. Sure, there are hypocrites and annoying people, but that’s everywhere in life. I didn’t stop going to college because of the annoying people. I never left a job because the people were weird or annoying. I have to somewhat laugh at the irony in self-righteously looking down on other people at church, while I judge them full of obnoxious pride. Talk about annoying. My husband tells our family time and again, “All the people in the pews are God’s children, too. They are our brothers and sisters with their own struggles and vices. They are no different from us in their humanness.”
Christ said, “You are Peter and upon this rock I will build my church” in Matthew 16:18. He meant this in two ways: First, the communion of people as the church. As Christians the world over, we are the church–the living church, the communion of saints, the Body of Christ. …
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]]>After my middle child “retired” from gymnastics, she wanted to try out different sports. She chose volleyball first and after learning the game, she was invited onto the traveling team. She was pretty excited, as was I, seeing as I played volleyball growing up. The coach set up an orientation meeting with the new parents to go over the handbook and policies. At the start of the meeting, one of the first things the coach said was, “We are thinking about doing practice on Sundays, is everyone okay with that?”
I looked around the room and every single parent nodded their head in agreement. I raised my hand and politely said, “No, I wouldn’t be okay with that.” The collective sigh from all in the room was very audible. I knew what they were thinking: “Here is one of those religious nuts.”
There was a time in my life when I would have nodded my head, too. On my drive home that day, I thought a lot about how our devotion to the Lord’s Day has been overshadowed by nearly everything else in our lives. It’s an afterthought, an “if we get around to it” kind of event, or, even worse, not even a thought at all.
Sitting in the car, I thought back over my faith journey, my pilgrimage, if you will. I remembered how when I was a teen, my mom never let me slack off in my attendance at church on Sundays. Some Sundays I went and didn’t mind, but there were several Sundays where I was loath to get out of bed and go.
In college, I think I maybe went to church eight times; two times a year for the four years I was in college. Those times would have been Easter and Christmas. I don’t even recall thinking that it might be a good idea to go to church at all during my college years. I was content to smugly tell myself that I was a believer and I was a “good” person. I thought that was sufficient.
Going to church was hit or miss for Dustin and me during our early years of marriage. Most Sundays we were happy to just sleep in. I was always arguing anyway with him about where to go to church since he was Catholic and I was Protestant. For awhile, our impasse impeded our presence in the pews.
I look back now and I realize that I had all the excuses:
“God knows I believe in Him, so that’s good enough.”
“I can worship God anywhere. I don’t need church.”
“People at church are annoying and hypocritical.”
“I can’t stand the music.”
“It’s so hard with a baby.”
“I need to sleep in. God understands.”
I could go on and on with the mountainous multitude of excuses I heaped up. Once I became Catholic, though, my understanding of church and its importance started to become clear. Mass is the source and summit of our lives and, if that is true, it means everything to be present in church on Sundays.
I’m a football fan. I love my Kansas State Wildcats. When I was in college, I was lucky enough to attend every single home game as a member of the marching band or just as a regular student. I love the atmosphere. The smells of BBQ and popcorn. The roar of the crowd that is so loud that it makes your eyes swim. In the summer, you sweat it out and wait for the sun to slip behind the press box. In the winter, you adorn yourself with layers and huddle close with your neighbor. There’s the anticipation, the excitement, the letdown, the heartache, the joy, and even the frustration that a fan goes through that makes the experience real, full, and worth the effort to go.
I live far away from my beloved Cats now and can’t go to home games like I desire. Some games, my husband and I have to listen to the game on the radio, old school like. Some Saturdays, we get to watch the Cats on TV, but it’s not the same. There are the distractions of home and kids. You don’t get to experience all the sensory sensations and it just doesn’t compare to being present in the stadium. What I miss the most, though, is being there with my Wildcat family. I miss the community. I miss hugging a complete stranger when we win a big game. I miss high-fiving my fellow Cat fans when there is a first down or an interception. I miss that closeness and that bond we share as fans of our university. It’s a bonding experience and it connects us in ways that watching on TV can’t replicate.
As I began to understand why God wants us to join on Sundays to worship Him, my whole outlook on it changed. Now, I desire now more than anything to be at Mass on Sundays. I wish I could go to daily Mass. I see the importance of gathering together with my fellow Catholics. Sure, there are hypocrites and annoying people, but that’s everywhere in life. I didn’t stop going to college because of the annoying people. I never left a job because the people were weird or annoying. I have to somewhat laugh at the irony in self-righteously looking down on other people at church, while I judge them full of obnoxious pride. Talk about annoying. My husband tells our family time and again, “All the people in the pews are God’s children, too. They are our brothers and sisters with their own struggles and vices. They are no different from us in their humanness.”
Christ said, “You are Peter and upon this rock I will build my church” in Matthew 16:18. He meant this in two ways: First, the communion of people as the church. As Christians the world over, we are the church–the living church, the communion of saints, the Body of Christ. …
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]]>
ANGER
I was musing over which of the seven deadly sins I was going to write about this week for my series, when the answer came to me in the form of a car accident. My husband and I were driving our oldest to gymnastics with our two other kids in the car. Ahead, we could see there was a minor car accident, but what was troublesome was that we could also see that people were fighting. At one point, I saw a man reach into the bed of his truck and pull out some kind of tool. He began waving it around and had it hit anyone, it would have inflicted serious injury.
As we pulled closer to the accident, we could definitely see that the two drivers were irate. They were cussing, screaming, totally clamoring for each other, but a woman was sandwiched between them, trying to stop them from tearing each other apart. The tool-wielding guy picked up his weapon again and started threatening with it. The car accident was so minor that there was barely any damage at all, yet these two guys were seething mad. Other drivers around were already calling the cops, thank goodness, and I hope that the two men didn’t end up killing each other over a fender bender before the cops arrived. I hope the lady was okay, too.
There was a time in my life when I really struggled with anger. I have blown up more times in my life than I care to mention. I’ve shattered relationships with my anger, which I deeply regret. Part of my anger stemmed from unresolved issues in my life that continually boiled to the surface and blew out in a volcanic rage. My husband has done a great job in helping me to calm down and cool my hot-headedness.
Let’s see what St. Gregory had to say on anger:
“Anger is also wont to exhort the conquered heart, as if with reason, when it says, The things that are done to thee cannot be borne patiently; nay rather, patiently to endure them is a sin; because if thou dost not withstand them with great indignation, they are afterwards heaped upon thee without measure.”
Laymen’s terms: Anger says that wrongs done to you don’t deserve patience, in fact, to be patient with them would be a sin. Why? Because if you just take it and don’t get angry, then more and more will happen and it will be all your fault for not getting angry over it.
There is some truth to this, in the fact that righteous anger is good. There are some things that we should never bear patiently. We should get mad over child abuse, corruption, murdering of the innocent, cruelty to animals, and acts of terror. Jesus even got extremely mad when people were using the Temple–His Father’s house–as a marketplace. He had righteous anger over it, as well He should.
The type of anger that comes from pride being wounded is not righteous and it often causes us to act out in dangerous and hurtful ways. St. Gregory says that anger brings with it “strifes, swelling of mind, insults, clamour, indignation, blasphemies.”
It’s so true. Anger has caused strife in millions of relationships. Half the time, the ones that are angry can’t even remember the reason they’re mad, but still they cling to their anger–they feel very justified in it. We all know that when we are angry we insult, name call, take the Lord’s name in vain, and scream and shout. So often, people make extremely poor decisions in the heat of anger; ones that they end up regretting once the dust settles. It’s awful what we do to each other in anger and it never makes anything better. No one ever walks away from a screaming, hitting, knock-out, drag down match and feels better. One might feel justified, but no one feels better.
The virtue that God gave us to strive for instead of giving over to anger is forgiveness. Just look at the words. The word anger looks, I don’t know, so harsh and tense. The word forgiveness looks calming and almost brings relief to your soul just by saying it. It’s hard to forgive someone who has hurt you, but we only continue to hurt ourselves by denying forgiveness. I have found in my life that when I withhold forgiveness, anger builds in me, until I can’t contain it anymore. Sadly, my wrath gets unleashed on someone that doesn’t really deserve it.
There has never been a time in my life when I’ve forgiven and then regretted it. Each and every time, it has brought peace to my life and healing. Sometimes, I’ve had to forgive people that I had to remove from my life because they were unhealthy for me, yet it is still important to forgive them. Sometimes, I’ve had to ask for forgiveness from someone I’ve wounded only to still have that relationship never fully recover. To be sure, there will be those in our lives that we will forgive numerous times because we all mess up and hurt each other. Sometimes the sin is minor, sometimes it is major, but, no matter what, forgiveness keeps us from being eaten alive by anger.
I didn’t like myself very much when I was angry all the time. I can’t imagine very many people liked having me around either. Forgiveness is something we all struggle to ask for and to offer to others. Pride has a lot to do with that. I’ve found, though, that the more I forgive the easier it becomes and it always creates healing within me.
Haven’t read the other deadly sins I’ve written about? Here’s Envy and here’s Gluttony.
…
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]]>ANGER
I was musing over which of the seven deadly sins I was going to write about this week for my series, when the answer came to me in the form of a car accident. My husband and I were driving our oldest to gymnastics with our two other kids in the car. Ahead, we could see there was a minor car accident, but what was troublesome was that we could also see that people were fighting. At one point, I saw a man reach into the bed of his truck and pull out some kind of tool. He began waving it around and had it hit anyone, it would have inflicted serious injury.
As we pulled closer to the accident, we could definitely see that the two drivers were irate. They were cussing, screaming, totally clamoring for each other, but a woman was sandwiched between them, trying to stop them from tearing each other apart. The tool-wielding guy picked up his weapon again and started threatening with it. The car accident was so minor that there was barely any damage at all, yet these two guys were seething mad. Other drivers around were already calling the cops, thank goodness, and I hope that the two men didn’t end up killing each other over a fender bender before the cops arrived. I hope the lady was okay, too.
There was a time in my life when I really struggled with anger. I have blown up more times in my life than I care to mention. I’ve shattered relationships with my anger, which I deeply regret. Part of my anger stemmed from unresolved issues in my life that continually boiled to the surface and blew out in a volcanic rage. My husband has done a great job in helping me to calm down and cool my hot-headedness.
Let’s see what St. Gregory had to say on anger:
“Anger is also wont to exhort the conquered heart, as if with reason, when it says, The things that are done to thee cannot be borne patiently; nay rather, patiently to endure them is a sin; because if thou dost not withstand them with great indignation, they are afterwards heaped upon thee without measure.”
Laymen’s terms: Anger says that wrongs done to you don’t deserve patience, in fact, to be patient with them would be a sin. Why? Because if you just take it and don’t get angry, then more and more will happen and it will be all your fault for not getting angry over it.
There is some truth to this, in the fact that righteous anger is good. There are some things that we should never bear patiently. We should get mad over child abuse, corruption, murdering of the innocent, cruelty to animals, and acts of terror. Jesus even got extremely mad when people were using the Temple–His Father’s house–as a marketplace. He had righteous anger over it, as well He should.
The type of anger that comes from pride being wounded is not righteous and it often causes us to act out in dangerous and hurtful ways. St. Gregory says that anger brings with it “strifes, swelling of mind, insults, clamour, indignation, blasphemies.”
It’s so true. Anger has caused strife in millions of relationships. Half the time, the ones that are angry can’t even remember the reason they’re mad, but still they cling to their anger–they feel very justified in it. We all know that when we are angry we insult, name call, take the Lord’s name in vain, and scream and shout. So often, people make extremely poor decisions in the heat of anger; ones that they end up regretting once the dust settles. It’s awful what we do to each other in anger and it never makes anything better. No one ever walks away from a screaming, hitting, knock-out, drag down match and feels better. One might feel justified, but no one feels better.
The virtue that God gave us to strive for instead of giving over to anger is forgiveness. Just look at the words. The word anger looks, I don’t know, so harsh and tense. The word forgiveness looks calming and almost brings relief to your soul just by saying it. It’s hard to forgive someone who has hurt you, but we only continue to hurt ourselves by denying forgiveness. I have found in my life that when I withhold forgiveness, anger builds in me, until I can’t contain it anymore. Sadly, my wrath gets unleashed on someone that doesn’t really deserve it.
There has never been a time in my life when I’ve forgiven and then regretted it. Each and every time, it has brought peace to my life and healing. Sometimes, I’ve had to forgive people that I had to remove from my life because they were unhealthy for me, yet it is still important to forgive them. Sometimes, I’ve had to ask for forgiveness from someone I’ve wounded only to still have that relationship never fully recover. To be sure, there will be those in our lives that we will forgive numerous times because we all mess up and hurt each other. Sometimes the sin is minor, sometimes it is major, but, no matter what, forgiveness keeps us from being eaten alive by anger.
I didn’t like myself very much when I was angry all the time. I can’t imagine very many people liked having me around either. Forgiveness is something we all struggle to ask for and to offer to others. Pride has a lot to do with that. I’ve found, though, that the more I forgive the easier it becomes and it always creates healing within me.
Haven’t read the other deadly sins I’ve written about? Here’s Envy and here’s Gluttony.
…
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]]>
I was asked an interesting question the other day. It was interesting enough that I thought it would be good to cover on my Friday short-question blog.
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray; and do thou oh prince of the heavenly host, by the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the earth seeking the ruin of souls.
Question: How can people believe in Satan and not believe there is a God?
I recently was listening to a talk by a former Satan worshipper, Betty Brennan. She was immersed in the higher echelons of Satanic worship. Thankfully, she is now Catholic and has left that life very far behind. During her talk she said two things that really stuck out to me.
- Satan worshippers believe Christ is real. Satan, as we must remember, is a fallen angel. He believes in God, but he does not worship God. Those who follow Satan, believe God exists and they work very hard to take down Christianity. They are most interested in taking down the Roman Catholic Church.
- In the Catholic Church we have seven Sacraments: Baptism, Confirmation, the Holy Eucharist, Holy Orders, Marriage, Reconciliation (Confession), and Anointing of the Sick. These are seven weapons that Christ gave us to use against evil. The reason that they are weapons against evil is because they infuse grace–sanctifying and sacramental–into our souls. They bring the Divine Life into us and help make us holy. Mrs. Brennan said that Satan worshippers understand the power of the seven Sacraments and that they “have seven rituals that they engage in that are in opposition to the seven Sacraments of the Catholic Church.” They also have Black Masses, which are anything but holy.
I have heard of those who say they “follow” Satan but they more correctly identify as just “followers of this world.” However, those that are steeped in the Satanic lifestyle do believe that God exists, they just don’t worship or adore Him. It is also a powerful witness to the Catholic Church that the number one enemy for them is the Roman Catholic Church. To be sure, there is a spiritual battle being waged and it’s important that we pay attention.
I ask that you take a moment to pray for those souls that have turned from God and chosen to follow one that will only lead them to misery. St. Michael the Archangel, pray for us.…
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]]>
I was asked an interesting question the other day. It was interesting enough that I thought it would be good to cover on my Friday short-question blog.
Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray; and do thou oh prince of the heavenly host, by the power of God, cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits who prowl about the earth seeking the ruin of souls.
Question: How can people believe in Satan and not believe there is a God?
I recently was listening to a talk by a former Satan worshipper, Betty Brennan. She was immersed in the higher echelons of Satanic worship. Thankfully, she is now Catholic and has left that life very far behind. During her talk she said two things that really stuck out to me.
- Satan worshippers believe Christ is real. Satan, as we must remember, is a fallen angel. He believes in God, but he does not worship God. Those who follow Satan, believe God exists and they work very hard to take down Christianity. They are most interested in taking down the Roman Catholic Church.
- In the Catholic Church we have seven Sacraments: Baptism, Confirmation, the Holy Eucharist, Holy Orders, Marriage, Reconciliation (Confession), and Anointing of the Sick. These are seven weapons that Christ gave us to use against evil. The reason that they are weapons against evil is because they infuse grace–sanctifying and sacramental–into our souls. They bring the Divine Life into us and help make us holy. Mrs. Brennan said that Satan worshippers understand the power of the seven Sacraments and that they “have seven rituals that they engage in that are in opposition to the seven Sacraments of the Catholic Church.” They also have Black Masses, which are anything but holy.
I have heard of those who say they “follow” Satan but they more correctly identify as just “followers of this world.” However, those that are steeped in the Satanic lifestyle do believe that God exists, they just don’t worship or adore Him. It is also a powerful witness to the Catholic Church that the number one enemy for them is the Roman Catholic Church. To be sure, there is a spiritual battle being waged and it’s important that we pay attention.
I ask that you take a moment to pray for those souls that have turned from God and chosen to follow one that will only lead them to misery. St. Michael the Archangel, pray for us.…
The post Q & A: How Can One Believe in Satan and Not God? appeared first on .
]]>
This year, I’m focusing on stories of former atheists that converted to Catholicism. How each person comes to Christ is unique and special, but especially interesting are those that go from no belief in God, to becoming members of the Catholic Church. For January, I interviewed Barry whom I recently met on social media. Originally from the Seattle area, he now resides in Baton Rouge. His story is the stuff of movies; truly a remarkable journey. It’s not just that Barry came into the Faith and believes in Christ; he puts his faith into action. He is the Associate Director for the Office of Evangelization and Catechesis in the Diocese of Baton Rouge. He visits with imprisoned men in his area, where he brings hope and encouragement by sharing Christ’s message. From a near death experience, to studying Buddhism in the Himalayas, to overcoming alcohol/drug addiction; this is a compelling story of a search for Christ. If you are like me, you’ll find Barry’s story quite remarkable.
1. Were you always an atheist or did you leave the faith and become one?
I am from a typical Pacific Northwest (Seattle area) family who is in a sense “post-Christian.” What I mean by this is that I was raised in an environment that didn’t even bring up the question of God, or of the Christian faith. We had some neighbors invite us to a Disciples of Christ Protestant ecclesial community and my sisters were baptized there, but I never really thought about the meaning of it and didn’t understand it. I didn’t have a feeling about it one way or another, it just wasn’t even on my radar. I had never heard anyone in my family discuss God or speak as if there was such thing as God, and so I definitely never experienced any sort of witness to Jesus as the Christ.
So, I was, in a sense an accidental atheist from the start. I wasn’t the type of atheist who was once Christian and rebelled against the faith intentionally and deliberately, rather, I was one by accident, by circumstances. I didn’t even have a rudimentary language for talking about ultimate reality, my origin and end, first principles, virtue and sin, or good and evil. And I definitely didn’t have a vocabulary for talking about God or knowing what the orthodox Christian faith taught in respect to the existence and attributes of the Creator or that Jesus was the Son of God and that the Church communicates Him.
Like the young Augustine, I sought out my completion in the world, in transient and sensual things. I didn’t know of any other way. I do remember, nonetheless, a time of greater innocence when my conscience alone communicated a sense of right and wrong, but by 15 or 16 years old this was largely clouded out by worldly clamors.
2. What was it that started to open the door for you, as far as considering the faith?
When I was 22 years old, I was critically injured in a car accident and had to be resuscitated. I had a near death experience. This radically changed my understanding of the meaning of life. Upon awakening from the NDE and since then, I have been involved in two primary tasks: Awakening to the gift of life and purifying my own life of attachment to sin. That path was intuitive to me after the accident and NDE though I wasn’t Christian. So I began a very intense period of spiritual searching, studying religion and philosophy. I studied both in school as an undergrad and graduate student, as well as in my personal life.
Like many in my socio-cultural demographic at the time I was more immediately drawn to the study of Indian religions, in particular Buddhism. For about five years, from 22-27 I studied it intensely in retreat and academic settings in N. America and India. I went as far as taking the five vows of a lay practitioner: 1) Abstain from killing 2) Abstain from fornication 3) Abstain from lying 4) Abstain from stealing 5) Abstain from intoxication.
It was in this milieu where I first began to exist in relationship to a transcendent source of morality and live as if my life had ultimate purpose. It was also in these contexts where I originally learned how to fast, how to be still and silent, how to meditate for long periods of time, how to renounce transient things for the sake of a transcendent goal. I also learned in this context, from a western Buddhist nun, of the moral horror of abortion. Up until that point, I though abortion could be justified. I also learned that mastubation, fornication, porn, intoxication, same sex acts, etc., were morally evil and very harmful (yes, even though everyone was doing promoting them as good and healthy!).
For the first time in my life I met men, usually Tibetan Buddhist monks (some nuns too), who were virtuous. This was very different from the men I was used to. And so, I would say, they were my first real formators in how to be a man. They taught me that a man isn’t a slave to his passions but rather gains mastery over them. The asceticism of these men was impressive, but their gentleness and kindness was even more impressive. I have always thought that if our own Christian faithful sought Jesus even half as intensely as these men sought liberation from suffering according to the path of the Buddha we wouldn’t have a priest shortage and the emptying out of our parishes in the West (I will leave that for another time).
I was in India, studying at the Library of Tibetan Works and Archives in Himachel Pradesh or the Himalayan Province, when I began to turn toward the Christian faith in earnest. I was studying Tibetan language and Buddhist Philosophy in a place called McLeod Ganj where the Tibetan government was and remains in exile. In a sense, …
The post January’s Atheist Conversion to Catholicism: Given a Second Chance at Life appeared first on .
]]>This year, I’m focusing on stories of former atheists that converted to Catholicism. How each person comes to Christ is unique and special, but especially interesting are those that go from no belief in God, to becoming members of the Catholic Church. For January, I interviewed Barry whom I recently met on social media. Originally from the Seattle area, he now resides in Baton Rouge. His story is the stuff of movies; truly a remarkable journey. It’s not just that Barry came into the Faith and believes in Christ; he puts his faith into action. He is the Associate Director for the Office of Evangelization and Catechesis in the Diocese of Baton Rouge. He visits with imprisoned men in his area, where he brings hope and encouragement by sharing Christ’s message. From a near death experience, to studying Buddhism in the Himalayas, to overcoming alcohol/drug addiction; this is a compelling story of a search for Christ. If you are like me, you’ll find Barry’s story quite remarkable.
1. Were you always an atheist or did you leave the faith and become one?
I am from a typical Pacific Northwest (Seattle area) family who is in a sense “post-Christian.” What I mean by this is that I was raised in an environment that didn’t even bring up the question of God, or of the Christian faith. We had some neighbors invite us to a Disciples of Christ Protestant ecclesial community and my sisters were baptized there, but I never really thought about the meaning of it and didn’t understand it. I didn’t have a feeling about it one way or another, it just wasn’t even on my radar. I had never heard anyone in my family discuss God or speak as if there was such thing as God, and so I definitely never experienced any sort of witness to Jesus as the Christ.
So, I was, in a sense an accidental atheist from the start. I wasn’t the type of atheist who was once Christian and rebelled against the faith intentionally and deliberately, rather, I was one by accident, by circumstances. I didn’t even have a rudimentary language for talking about ultimate reality, my origin and end, first principles, virtue and sin, or good and evil. And I definitely didn’t have a vocabulary for talking about God or knowing what the orthodox Christian faith taught in respect to the existence and attributes of the Creator or that Jesus was the Son of God and that the Church communicates Him.
Like the young Augustine, I sought out my completion in the world, in transient and sensual things. I didn’t know of any other way. I do remember, nonetheless, a time of greater innocence when my conscience alone communicated a sense of right and wrong, but by 15 or 16 years old this was largely clouded out by worldly clamors.
2. What was it that started to open the door for you, as far as considering the faith?
When I was 22 years old, I was critically injured in a car accident and had to be resuscitated. I had a near death experience. This radically changed my understanding of the meaning of life. Upon awakening from the NDE and since then, I have been involved in two primary tasks: Awakening to the gift of life and purifying my own life of attachment to sin. That path was intuitive to me after the accident and NDE though I wasn’t Christian. So I began a very intense period of spiritual searching, studying religion and philosophy. I studied both in school as an undergrad and graduate student, as well as in my personal life.
Like many in my socio-cultural demographic at the time I was more immediately drawn to the study of Indian religions, in particular Buddhism. For about five years, from 22-27 I studied it intensely in retreat and academic settings in N. America and India. I went as far as taking the five vows of a lay practitioner: 1) Abstain from killing 2) Abstain from fornication 3) Abstain from lying 4) Abstain from stealing 5) Abstain from intoxication.
It was in this milieu where I first began to exist in relationship to a transcendent source of morality and live as if my life had ultimate purpose. It was also in these contexts where I originally learned how to fast, how to be still and silent, how to meditate for long periods of time, how to renounce transient things for the sake of a transcendent goal. I also learned in this context, from a western Buddhist nun, of the moral horror of abortion. Up until that point, I though abortion could be justified. I also learned that mastubation, fornication, porn, intoxication, same sex acts, etc., were morally evil and very harmful (yes, even though everyone was doing promoting them as good and healthy!).
For the first time in my life I met men, usually Tibetan Buddhist monks (some nuns too), who were virtuous. This was very different from the men I was used to. And so, I would say, they were my first real formators in how to be a man. They taught me that a man isn’t a slave to his passions but rather gains mastery over them. The asceticism of these men was impressive, but their gentleness and kindness was even more impressive. I have always thought that if our own Christian faithful sought Jesus even half as intensely as these men sought liberation from suffering according to the path of the Buddha we wouldn’t have a priest shortage and the emptying out of our parishes in the West (I will leave that for another time).
I was in India, studying at the Library of Tibetan Works and Archives in Himachel Pradesh or the Himalayan Province, when I began to turn toward the Christian faith in earnest. I was studying Tibetan language and Buddhist Philosophy in a place called McLeod Ganj where the Tibetan government was and remains in exile. In a sense, …
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I got another question in regards to the differences between a Catholic Bible and a Protestant Bible. I know that when I was a Protestant I had no clue that there was even a difference, but there is–seven books to be exact.
Question: Is there a difference between a Catholic Bible and a Protestant Bible?
Short answer: Yes, there is a difference.
Longer answer:
Back when I was a Protestant, I thought all Bibles were the same. Then, I heard that Catholics have seven books that Protestant Bibles don’t have. What gives?
I think it is important to remember that when the Apostles and their first successors were going around spreading the Good News, they did not have a full and complete Bible. When the Apostles were alive, there wasn’t even a New Testament–not all the books had been written and compiled yet. The Apostles and the first Christians worked without a Bible–they worked off of Sacred Oral Tradition and the Magisterium of the Catholic Church. “By the 5th century, the New Testament as we know it today was decided upon and settled.”*
The Canon of Scripture that the Catholic Church still has today was compiled by the Catholic Church right before the 400s. Nothing changed until the 1500s when Martin Luther decided to remove books. By his own authority, he removed Tobit, Judith, 1st & 2nd Maccabees, Wisdom, Sirach and Baruch of the Old Testament. Martin Luther also wanted to remove Hebrews, James, Jude, and Revelations. He moved them to an appendix in the back of the Bible, with the hopes that they would eventually be removed. Later on, followers of Luther (Lutherans) didn’t even follow their leader and put the four appendixed books back into the New Testament. “He also added the word (in his German translation) only in Romans 3:20 and Romans 4:15, and he inserted the word alone in Romans 3:28.”
It has been said by some in Protestant circles that Catholics added books to the Bible, but this is inaccurate. Remember, the Canon of Scripture used by the Catholic Church and Eastern Orthodox had been around for over a millennium when Luther decided to change things. It must be asked what gives one man the authority to remove books? The biggest reason he rejected these books is that they contain doctrines that Martin Luther did not support.
There is nowhere in the Bible that tells us which books of the Bible are to be used. In fact, that would be a very difficult thing for the Bible to touch upon. The Bible was first compiled by the Catholic Church under the guidance of the Holy Spirit given to the Church by Christ. It was the Magisterium of the Catholic Church that gave us the Bible. There were a lot of discussions, debates, and discernment that went into compiling the books of the Bible. It seems very unlikely that one man, over a thousand years later, would have the authority to decide that the authority of the Church was wrong. What is to stop someone else from coming along and saying they have discerned the “true books of the Bible”?
*From the book The Protestant’s Dilemma by Devin Rose. pg. 69…
The post Q & A: Say What? Why Isn’t the Catholic Bible the Same as a Protestant Bible? appeared first on .
]]>I got another question in regards to the differences between a Catholic Bible and a Protestant Bible. I know that when I was a Protestant I had no clue that there was even a difference, but there is–seven books to be exact.
Question: Is there a difference between a Catholic Bible and a Protestant Bible?
Short answer: Yes, there is a difference.
Longer answer:
Back when I was a Protestant, I thought all Bibles were the same. Then, I heard that Catholics have seven books that Protestant Bibles don’t have. What gives?
I think it is important to remember that when the Apostles and their first successors were going around spreading the Good News, they did not have a full and complete Bible. When the Apostles were alive, there wasn’t even a New Testament–not all the books had been written and compiled yet. The Apostles and the first Christians worked without a Bible–they worked off of Sacred Oral Tradition and the Magisterium of the Catholic Church. “By the 5th century, the New Testament as we know it today was decided upon and settled.”*
The Canon of Scripture that the Catholic Church still has today was compiled by the Catholic Church right before the 400s. Nothing changed until the 1500s when Martin Luther decided to remove books. By his own authority, he removed Tobit, Judith, 1st & 2nd Maccabees, Wisdom, Sirach and Baruch of the Old Testament. Martin Luther also wanted to remove Hebrews, James, Jude, and Revelations. He moved them to an appendix in the back of the Bible, with the hopes that they would eventually be removed. Later on, followers of Luther (Lutherans) didn’t even follow their leader and put the four appendixed books back into the New Testament. “He also added the word (in his German translation) only in Romans 3:20 and Romans 4:15, and he inserted the word alone in Romans 3:28.”
It has been said by some in Protestant circles that Catholics added books to the Bible, but this is inaccurate. Remember, the Canon of Scripture used by the Catholic Church and Eastern Orthodox had been around for over a millennium when Luther decided to change things. It must be asked what gives one man the authority to remove books? The biggest reason he rejected these books is that they contain doctrines that Martin Luther did not support.
There is nowhere in the Bible that tells us which books of the Bible are to be used. In fact, that would be a very difficult thing for the Bible to touch upon. The Bible was first compiled by the Catholic Church under the guidance of the Holy Spirit given to the Church by Christ. It was the Magisterium of the Catholic Church that gave us the Bible. There were a lot of discussions, debates, and discernment that went into compiling the books of the Bible. It seems very unlikely that one man, over a thousand years later, would have the authority to decide that the authority of the Church was wrong. What is to stop someone else from coming along and saying they have discerned the “true books of the Bible”?
*From the book The Protestant’s Dilemma by Devin Rose. pg. 69…
The post Q & A: Say What? Why Isn’t the Catholic Bible the Same as a Protestant Bible? appeared first on .
]]>Question time. I’m tackling a difficult subject today and I hope you’ll stick with me through to the end to get my thoughts on the matter.
Question: How you can overlook the long, long history of Church authority figures (sexually) abusing children? How do Catholics move past this horrific thing?
Right off the bat, let’s be clear–I’ve never overlooked it. I think it’s important to realize that just because I am Catholic, does not mean I ever turned a blind eye to this matter. In fact, because my background deals with sexual crimes, I take it very, very seriously. Before I became Catholic, I struggled with this whole sex abuse scandal in the Church. Believe me, I never overlook this topic no matter where the sexual abuse comes from, which leads me to my first point on this matter.
If you are going to ask me this question, I must first ask you one. Do you, in addition, recognize the long, long history of sexual abuse in schools, colleges, sports, clubs, churches, and families? I’m going to assume that if you are someone that is greatly concerned with sexual abuse then you are also a person that vehemently opposes pornography and sex-trafficking, because such things promote objectification, coercion, and degradation of another human being in sexual ways. These things all end up leading to sexual abuse. If you’re outraged by the Catholic Church sex abuse scandal, then I’m sure you’re also furious about these examples, as well. With that said, let’s continue…
I have counseled and advocated for victims of sexual abuse from all walks of life. I’ve heard stories from victims being abused by their coach, their teacher, their neighbor, their brother, their father, their dad’s best friend, their cousin, police officers, pastors, state attorneys, and politicians. You name it, I’ve heard it. So, if I was to keep myself and my kids away from all the places that people can possibly be abused, I’d never go anywhere. Ever. At all. Sexual abuse happens all the time in schools and we still send our kids to schools. Rates of sexual abuse are even higher in schools and barely anyone highlights this fact. People’s outrage tends to be focused towards the Catholic Church on this subject…and it should be…as well as all places.
I’ll be the first to raise my hand and say that the Church had an extremely poor response to the sexual abuse scandals. Their response was unacceptable, but not unique. I’ve dealt with mothers, knowing that their children were being sexually abused, neglected to remove them from the situation. They embraced denial and swept it under the rug. This is a completely inappropriate response, but it’s a very common response to sexual abuse. It’s such an abhorrent topic that most people simply can’t believe there is such evil so close to them. So, they turn a blind eye to protect their mental health. The cover-up is also particularly disturbing, yet, this also is not unique. Please don’t take this as excusing, but I think it is important to understand that cover-ups are very common. I’ve dealt with and studied cover-ups from all institutions. It’s not an excuse, but it’s not a unique response. As a world, we do a shoddy job of responding and handling sexual abuse–across the board. The stories that I have personally dealt with involving cover-ups are maddening. I’d share them, but time doesn’t allow for it.
I definitely appreciate people’s concern over this scandal when looking at the Catholic Church, because, well, they hold the Catholic Church to a higher standard…and they should. When atheists ask me about this topic, I sometimes respond with, “Sexual abuse happens in schools, too, and you still send your kids there, do you not?”
Every single time they answer back with, “Yes, but it’s the Catholic Church. They should be held to a higher standard.”
I completely agree. Even atheists understand that the Church founded by Christ should look different. Sadly, though, we live in a fallen world and even people who claim to be Christians commit terrible sins. For me, I have to look at something different: Does the Church teach that sexual abuse is okay? Does it encourage, as an institution, the abuse of children? No, it doesn’t. If it did, I’d leave before the door could hit me, because that would be opposed to God. In fact, I would never take myself or my children to any place that promoted, encouraged, and taught that sexual abuse is okay. The best I can do as a mother is equip my children with knowledge on this topic, speak to them about it frequently, and constantly be on my guard and try to discern the character of the people I let into their lives. I cannot lock up my kids and keep them from living because this danger is out there. Trust me, there are times when I would like to do that.
I am grateful that people hold the Catholic Church to such a high standard. It’s the biggest organization for good in the world and it should always be striving to shine that light of Christ. Unfortunately, it sometimes takes scandals to wake people up and show them that they should be doing a better job. It’s heartbreaking that so many had to suffer before people took this seriously. The Church is working to fix this problem. If you want to see what they are doing, go here. If I saw that they were doing nothing and continuing on in the same fashion, this would be cause for great concern. I do see them working to fix policies and defrock priests that have committed abuses. I know it isn’t moving at the speed of light, as many in our culture would want, but things don’t just happen overnight. When I was writing policies and procedures for the sexual abuse program I was in charge of, it took me years to finish, and this was …
The post Question and Answer: How Can You Overlook The Church’s Sex Scandal? appeared first on .
]]>Question time. I’m tackling a difficult subject today and I hope you’ll stick with me through to the end to get my thoughts on the matter.
Question: How you can overlook the long, long history of Church authority figures (sexually) abusing children? How do Catholics move past this horrific thing?
Right off the bat, let’s be clear–I’ve never overlooked it. I think it’s important to realize that just because I am Catholic, does not mean I ever turned a blind eye to this matter. In fact, because my background deals with sexual crimes, I take it very, very seriously. Before I became Catholic, I struggled with this whole sex abuse scandal in the Church. Believe me, I never overlook this topic no matter where the sexual abuse comes from, which leads me to my first point on this matter.
If you are going to ask me this question, I must first ask you one. Do you, in addition, recognize the long, long history of sexual abuse in schools, colleges, sports, clubs, churches, and families? I’m going to assume that if you are someone that is greatly concerned with sexual abuse then you are also a person that vehemently opposes pornography and sex-trafficking, because such things promote objectification, coercion, and degradation of another human being in sexual ways. These things all end up leading to sexual abuse. If you’re outraged by the Catholic Church sex abuse scandal, then I’m sure you’re also furious about these examples, as well. With that said, let’s continue…
I have counseled and advocated for victims of sexual abuse from all walks of life. I’ve heard stories from victims being abused by their coach, their teacher, their neighbor, their brother, their father, their dad’s best friend, their cousin, police officers, pastors, state attorneys, and politicians. You name it, I’ve heard it. So, if I was to keep myself and my kids away from all the places that people can possibly be abused, I’d never go anywhere. Ever. At all. Sexual abuse happens all the time in schools and we still send our kids to schools. Rates of sexual abuse are even higher in schools and barely anyone highlights this fact. People’s outrage tends to be focused towards the Catholic Church on this subject…and it should be…as well as all places.
I’ll be the first to raise my hand and say that the Church had an extremely poor response to the sexual abuse scandals. Their response was unacceptable, but not unique. I’ve dealt with mothers, knowing that their children were being sexually abused, neglected to remove them from the situation. They embraced denial and swept it under the rug. This is a completely inappropriate response, but it’s a very common response to sexual abuse. It’s such an abhorrent topic that most people simply can’t believe there is such evil so close to them. So, they turn a blind eye to protect their mental health. The cover-up is also particularly disturbing, yet, this also is not unique. Please don’t take this as excusing, but I think it is important to understand that cover-ups are very common. I’ve dealt with and studied cover-ups from all institutions. It’s not an excuse, but it’s not a unique response. As a world, we do a shoddy job of responding and handling sexual abuse–across the board. The stories that I have personally dealt with involving cover-ups are maddening. I’d share them, but time doesn’t allow for it.
I definitely appreciate people’s concern over this scandal when looking at the Catholic Church, because, well, they hold the Catholic Church to a higher standard…and they should. When atheists ask me about this topic, I sometimes respond with, “Sexual abuse happens in schools, too, and you still send your kids there, do you not?”
Every single time they answer back with, “Yes, but it’s the Catholic Church. They should be held to a higher standard.”
I completely agree. Even atheists understand that the Church founded by Christ should look different. Sadly, though, we live in a fallen world and even people who claim to be Christians commit terrible sins. For me, I have to look at something different: Does the Church teach that sexual abuse is okay? Does it encourage, as an institution, the abuse of children? No, it doesn’t. If it did, I’d leave before the door could hit me, because that would be opposed to God. In fact, I would never take myself or my children to any place that promoted, encouraged, and taught that sexual abuse is okay. The best I can do as a mother is equip my children with knowledge on this topic, speak to them about it frequently, and constantly be on my guard and try to discern the character of the people I let into their lives. I cannot lock up my kids and keep them from living because this danger is out there. Trust me, there are times when I would like to do that.
I am grateful that people hold the Catholic Church to such a high standard. It’s the biggest organization for good in the world and it should always be striving to shine that light of Christ. Unfortunately, it sometimes takes scandals to wake people up and show them that they should be doing a better job. It’s heartbreaking that so many had to suffer before people took this seriously. The Church is working to fix this problem. If you want to see what they are doing, go here. If I saw that they were doing nothing and continuing on in the same fashion, this would be cause for great concern. I do see them working to fix policies and defrock priests that have committed abuses. I know it isn’t moving at the speed of light, as many in our culture would want, but things don’t just happen overnight. When I was writing policies and procedures for the sexual abuse program I was in charge of, it took me years to finish, and this was …
The post Question and Answer: How Can You Overlook The Church’s Sex Scandal? appeared first on .
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