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Last night, I was explaining to my son that Advent is a time of expectant waiting. While we aren’t really waiting for Jesus’ first coming anymore, we do prepare to celebrate His birth. We, also, need to open our hearts for Him to come into them. How do we go about doing that? One way is to relinquish control. Yesterday, someone commented that they know God has forgiven them, but they struggle to forgive themselves. Many expressed that they could relate to this. I could relate to this as I once struggled with the same thing. To forgive myself meant, in my mind, that I was condoning my sinful actions. Forgiveness always feels a bit like that to us humans. It’s why we struggle to forgive others. We don’t want them thinking we are okay with what they did. In our pride, masked as humility, we withhold forgiving ourselves as if to attempt to outdo God in justice. “God can forgive me, but I won’t forgive myself because what I did was just so bad. Look, I’ll continue to punish myself. Look how just I am.” This is pride talking. We are not more just than God. Imagine if your child did something wrong and hurt you. After some time, they come and ask for forgiveness and you give it. Then, sadly, they continue to beat themselves up over it. As a parent, this would deeply sadden you and worry you as you watch your child continue to punish themselves. As a parent, you wouldn’t want this and neither does God want it for you. This Advent, if you struggle to forgive yourself, offer that control over to God. If He has forgiven you and you are contrite about it, let go of your pride and stop trying to outdo Christ’s sacrifice on the Cross. He opened the door to forgiveness and flourishing, don’t undermine that. Pray for the graces to give up the control, Catholic Pilgrims. God does not want you stuck. He wants you to be transformed with His light and love. It’s okay to forgive yourself. Have a blessed Monday.
Continue ReadingA few weeks ago, I was in Berkeley and during the homily, the priest said that when he used to teach at a Catholic high school, he’d ask his students if they wanted to be saints. The overwhelming majority said, “No.” When the priest pressed as to why, they said they didn’t believe they could truly be themselves if they were saints. Isn’t that interesting and devastatingly sad? What an incredible job Satan and the world has done in convincing us that holiness is boring, lame, and strips us of our true selves. Holiness is the exact opposite, though. It helps us to transform into who God truly meant us to be. Why is it that we think a life of sin is better? Why do we think this and then at the same time try to think ourselves better than “big-time” sinners? Nobody is inspired by a life that was/is steeped in sin. We are inspired by saints, even if we won’t admit it. The truth of the matter all comes down to trust and faith. I know, because I used to think like those high school teens. Too many people don’t trust that a life of holiness will be fulfilling and too many people lack faith that Heaven is better than any pleasure we experience here on earth. We are not impressive when we sin. Sinning is easy and asks nothing of us other than to give in. Striving for holiness is not easy. It asks a lot of us, which isn’t a bad thing. St. Paul encourages the Thessalonians, and ultimately us, to “be blameless in holiness before Our God and Father at the coming of our Lord Jesus with all His holy ones.” You were made to be a saint. We were all born to be saints. There is nothing boring, lame, or stifling about striving for holiness, Catholic Pilgrims, no matter what the world tells you. Have a beautiful first Sunday of Advent.
Continue ReadingThe other day, I got an email from a guy who started off overly cheery. He stated that he was so glad he’d found my site, he loved learning the truth, and was encouraged by how much I loved Jesus. His tone then took a quick turn and he dove into a litany of reasons that the Catholic Church was diabolical. He told me that I was deceived and was going to go to Hell. I appreciated this guy’s concern, but I had to laugh a bit, because all his arguments were things I once believed about the Church. I once said the same things, just not quite so manically. I believed the Church was a small cult. I believed that Catholics thought the pope couldn’t sin. I believed the Catholic Church was a relatively new institution. I believed that Catholics thought Mary was a goddess. I had all these preconceived notions, but I never asked a Catholic about any of it, until I married my cradle Catholic husband. I had been deceived. Everything I had been told was wrong. That was really hard for me because I hate being wrong. Jesus says in today’s Gospel reading, “See that you not be deceived.” I am eternally grateful that God gave me the graces to not remain stubborn and cling to my preconceived notions. I am the type that can really dig in my heels. God knew that the person who would open my eyes would be a man I deeply respect and fully love…and who is as sharp as a tack. He gave me my husband to stand against my attacks and blows and calmly swat each one of them down. I didn’t respond to the guy who sent me the email. He was disingenuous in his approach to me and I could tell, having once been there myself, that he was not going to receive anything I had to counter with. How do we not be deceived, Catholic Pilgrims? We pray, we weigh, we ask questions, we seek out people who know more than us, we don’t make hasty decisions, and we don’t let emotions guide our judgment. It’s hard to do all these things, but it’s worth it. Live the Faith boldly and travel well this Tuesday.
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